The Obligatory Christmas Party Cheat Meal

Around Christmas time, there are always those social events that you feel obligated to attend. Whether it be a family gathering, a get together with friends or the work Christmas party. If you are on a strict meal plan or you are simply watching what you eat, navigating through these minefields of tantalizing temptations can be a daunting task. Perhaps if you are planning to do 24 hours of cardio the following day, you may not be worried. For someone such as myself who is not fond of cardio, this is not an option.

Yesterday I attended a work Christmas party which was held at a lovely, albeit somewhat odd midtown restaurant. This restaurant had no signage, simply 5 doors posted above the main entrance. You cannot enter food establishment as cool as this and not eat the food, so I resigned myself to allow the consumption of some of the healthier options. It took quite some time for everyone to arrive and therefore the customary bread before the meal wasn’t even brought out until an hour after I had arrived. Great, I don’t eat bread. What you must understand is that I am always hungry. For someone who works out as much as I do, to not eat at regular intervals makes me feel like my body is consuming itself from the inside out. Anticipating the consumption of a cheat meal when you are starving is never a good thing…just thinking about the giant portions of food I wanted to consume was giving me a muffin top.

My work was footing the bill for this meal so I would look like a total douche if I just sat there with an empty plate all night long while drinking my lame water. So when the first course of appetizers came out, I nibbled enough to make my plate look dirty in order to give the appearance that I ate. Before I go any further, I will not have you getting the impression that I starve myself. I had already eaten dinner, and this meal was second dinner. I often have second breakfast, second lunch and second dinner.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t touch the second course. There were platters of spaghetti, penne and risotto all smothered in creamy sauce. Since I couldn’t eat it, I would have loved to just bathe in it. This is the crazy that I have become. Actually I have become accustomed to satisfying myself through my sense of smell. You do get very strange looks when you ask someone if you can smell their food, and then two minutes later you ask to do it again. But, you got to do what you got to do. I almost had a heart attack when I learned of the third course. Protein! Salmon, chicken and steak… I can eat! I hope no one noticed my tears of joy.

And then there were desserts. How can you possibly resist the decadent display of will power destroying treats? Look at these cookies! Thank goodness they are too cute to eat or I may have just buckled and gained an extra ass cheek.

As I am still a human being and not a robot who is immune to the mortal affliction known as the craving, I did have two small bites of bread pudding. They were tasty yet not sweet enough to make me feel I wanted to sew my mouth shut to prevent further acts of indulgence. With that said, I wish you all the best with your attempts at avoiding the gluttonous activity that is the obligatory Christmas party cheat meal..and I better see you at the gym tomorrow!


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