Cardio and the Food Monster

Lets take a little stroll down memory lane. The first gym membership that I ever had was with an all women’s gym. I stupidly rushed into signing up because it was cheap and did not realize the potential dire consequences of my actions. Of course these consequences became apparent when I discovered that I couldn’t go for long periods of time without staring at muscular men. I was suffering from withdrawal, a sad, boring, man-less withdrawal.  I felt like a dog without a bone, a fish without water, Kim Kardashian without her ass…. I am amazed at how quickly I went way off topic just there. This isn’t supposed to be a post about boys, damn it.

So, this all women’s gym was smaller than most and its cardio section was set up like a movie theatre with 5 rows of machines with about 5 tvs hanging from the ceiling in front of the first row of machines. While I was at this gym, I had not yet discovered my love of weights so a significant portions of my workouts consisted of cardio. I have always found cardio to be hideously boring so like the rest of the population I attempted to use the television as a distraction. It just so happens that two out of the five tvs were programmed to food network television and these channels could not be changed. If you wanted to watch some tv you were forced to stare at some skinny bitch as she whips up an artery clogging cake or as she bakes a muffin top maker of a fatty dish. This is not what I want to be watching while I am sweating it out on the devil of cardio machines.

Initially, seeing donuts, cookies and cakes in front of me as I attempted to blast some fat actually caused me to have a very negative reaction. I was upset that the gym VIPs who possessed the tv channel changing powers had decided to put this tantalizing torturous temptation tv in front of my eyeballs. How dare they? This does not belong in a gym! I demand an end to this ludicrousness….But then, with every passing minute, my views began to morph. I started to enjoy watching it. What does it say of me that I enjoyed watching people make such decadent and cellulite inducing recipes all while I was working out? What does this mean, friends?

So now I remain on the fence regarding my opinions of watching the food network while working out. Seeing as I have no strong point of view on this issue, it kind of makes this blog post pointless but I wanted to share my middle of the road thoughts anyway. I did find that while I was watching the delicious food items, I wanted to consume them as rapidly as is humanly possible, however when the workout was over, my cravings thankfully subsided. So no harm, no foul I guess… I wonder what kind of emotions would be brought up if the opposite scenario were to occur. If you were eating some gourmet dessert and watching someone workout on TV, what would you feel like…? I suspect that one would feel like shit. F U workout videos. Am I to believe that the moral of the story then, is that if you are going to eat junk, do it in isolation from the world to avoid any unnecessary guilt? Well, maybe then I can rationalize devouring my pizza.


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