The Win That Almost Wasn’t

sprayHave you ever tried so hard to accomplish something and then due to someone else’s actions, what you worked so hard for was almost ruined? Well, remember when I told you that I won 1st place the November contest…? Well it almost didn’t happen.

Normally, shows begin around 9 or 10am which means I usually get my spray tan done the day before the show. It is a pain in the ass because you can’t wear anything tight, no one can touch you and you have to sleep like a starfish. Perhaps some skin types take the tan better, but my skin is notorious for repelling the tan.

Things were a little different for the November show. The show was to begin at 6pm so I figured I had plenty of time to get my tan done the day of. I scheduled the tan for 11am and when the time came, off I went. Here is where the trouble began…

The lady who owns the spray tan salon and who normally does my tan was on maternity leave. This is of course perfectly acceptable. However, if you are going to continue to take my business, I expect that I will receive the same service. I don’t know where the owner found this girl but she must have been still in high school and clearly had never done a competition spray tan before. Let me stress that a competition spray tan is very different than a regular spray tan.

Feeling scepticism yet hopefully optimistic, I stripped down and prayed for a good outcome. I was right to feel scepticism… I kept telling her that the tan needed to be darker, darker, darker. She called the owner several times yet the result was not what I needed it to be. Clearly this girl was missing a step. I can’t necessarily blame her as the owner left her ill prepared. She lathered me with coat after coat and it got to a point where if she put anymore on, it would just be dripping.

As I stood naked in the room to dry, the lack of heat was almost unbearable. I asked if there was anything that could be done to warm the space but junior mint told replied with a “no”. As the tan dries and I begin to freeze to death, I look at myself in the mirror and almost shit a brick. This is not acceptable.

When dry, I went to the front desk. Not only am I extremely unhappy with the tan but I also find out that the rates have been raised. I tell her to call the owner and demand a reduced rate as I am extremely unhappy. The owner tells junior mint that the spray tan costs more and the full balance is due. Thinking back, I should have fought harder because I paid for a spray tan but did NOT receive one.

By the time I got home, the tan around my hips was smudged terribly and it was way too light to step on stage. I began to ball my eyes out and proceeded to create racoon eyes as the tan around my eyes was washed away. Keep in mind that she show is just hours away at this point.

I call a different salon that tells me to shower the previous tan off and then they will redo it. Feeling somewhat less stressed, I shower and rush over.

I strip down and the tanning process begins. And ends… Oops there is not enough formula. What…the…hell…am…I…supposed…to…do?

Feeling bad for me, this new salon calls another salon and makes an emergency appointment for me. I rush over and finally I am at ease. The tan is dark, the tan is even, the tan is competition worthy!

As I stand drying in a nice warm room, I am excited about my great tan but that is not the only thing to consider. As it approaches 4pm, I still have not done my hair or makeup and we still have to consider driving time… F.

Once dry, I rush home. The makeup ends up looking ok but there is no time for the hair…what? I had wanted to curl the hair but it looks like it is just going to have to stay straight. In a competition where a bad tan, bad makeup or bad hair can cost you the win, I was slightly concerned.

Well, I guess good things come to those who persevere because I ended up winning in the bikini category. The road to success is never straight and easy, I suppose. Adversity will make you stronger and teach you a lot. In the grand scheme of things, if this is the worst thing in the world to ever happen to me, it’s not so bad (especially considering the outcome).

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